{Truly Tasteless}

[Lilith]

*WARNING*some of these are really crude jokes but sooooooo funny

Farmer & the Cow
There was a farmer who owned a bull and a female cow and was trying desperately to mate the two. No matter what he did the bull didn't want any.
Finally he went to a friend who claimed to have had the same problem. So he asked him what could he do. The friend told him that he had to stick his arm up the cows pussy and rub it on the bull's nose. After doing so the bull went crazy and started humping the cow over and over.

With the success of the bull the farmer starts to wonder if this will work for him. So that night he gets in bed and starts playing with his wife. He rubs his nose with his hand and gets the biggest boner he has ever gotten.

He wakes his wife and tells her to look. She looks, and with a mean look on her face says, "You woke me up to show me that you have a bloody nose."

[Lilith]

Shush
2 guys are drinking at a bar when one turns to the other & says "Right, time I was going home, the wife only lets me have 4 beers" His friend says, "No, no, no, that'll never do. You should do what I do. Drink as many beers as you can fit down you, follow that with 5 tequilas, 3 whiskeys & a bourbon! Then go home, shove your head under the blanket & lick your wifes pussy like crazy, she WONT complain after, trust me!" So the 1st guy says "FUCK IT!!",, gets tanked and wobbles home. After he stumbles up the stairs he opens the bedroom door, and without hesitation, dives under the blanket and licks away!

After 5 minutes he figures "Right, best go wash up or she'll never kiss me like this " So of to the bathroom he goes. When he gets there he see's his wife, laid there in the bath reading a book. "What the fuck!!" he shouts out. "SHUSH!!" shewispers back to him "You'll wake your mother!!"

[skipthisone]

Sick, sick puppies

[Lilith]

It gets worse:o:o I think I should be punished for posting this one ;)


Sand Paper Sally
This guy is really desperate one night and he goes to this whore house and asks for the very best hooker they got..well they only have one available, Sand Paper Sally. This deperate guy is all what the hell so he goes up to a room and begins to have sex with her. For some odd reason it hurts and he asked her why, she stops and gets off him and excuses herself to the bathroom. About ten minutes later she returns and starts to have sex with the guy again. The guy was suprised how good it felt and he asked sally what she did and she said, "Oh nothing really, just picked my scabs."

[Lilith]

Bob's out back workin on the car


Cleaning out the exhaust (http://www.funkyshit.org/funkypics/X_Rated/ab27)

[Lilith]

One time at band camp......

........flautist (http://www.funkyshit.org/funkypics/X_Rated/flutepussy)

[Eros]

Originally posted by Lilith
One time at band camp......

........flautist (http://www.funkyshit.org/funkypics/X_Rated/flutepussy)

Now all they need to do is past Allyson Hannigans face on that pic...lol.

[Eliza]

OMG! Lilith! Did you look through all those pics? Some were enough to give you nightmares! LOL
That guy with his dick in the tailpipe...that's got the makings of a trip to the ER and a great story for the doctors.

Eliza

[scotzoidman]

Originally posted by Lilith
Bob's out back workin on the car


Cleaning out the exhaust (http://www.funkyshit.org/funkypics/X_Rated/ab27) Gaddam, some body lost a bet or what...

[Cheyanne]

Did you guys look at the rest of the pictures? I just can't..............look...........oh, my, did you see the size of that pop bottle?

Somebody definitly lost a bet.........

[ryker]

aaarrrggghhh.....Lilith...help me.....i looked...all of them......mind numb....need therapy.....HELP!!!!

[Horny24/7]

Originally posted by Lilith
One time at band camp......

........flautist (http://www.funkyshit.org/funkypics/X_Rated/flutepussy)

Brings new meaning to the term "Skin Flute":cool: