View Full Version : Sexual Fortune Cookie
jennaflower
07-02-2003, 09:34 PM
Here is a scenerio....
You just finished a nice romantic dinner with your partner... the only thing left is the fortune cookie.... what does yours say??
dadaist
07-02-2003, 09:40 PM
You will soon be met with great pleasure and pain...
(Hey, where's jennaflower's? :p)
White Noise
07-02-2003, 09:47 PM
That wasn't chicken - whoops, I have missed the point. *LOL*
How about - don't turn out the lights
a shower together a day is a wise investment.
White Noise
07-02-2003, 10:03 PM
Especially in Australia where we have water restrictions.
Goddess_X
07-02-2003, 10:09 PM
05 12 22 24 31 44
get it? lotto numbers. :D
speedy
07-02-2003, 10:15 PM
you will soon find untold happiness
Vicious Tease
07-02-2003, 10:24 PM
Love well today for tomorrow is never certain.
You will be hungry in one hour! ;)
Lilith
07-02-2003, 11:15 PM
I have a fortune cookie fortune obsession...they are taped all over my monitor. I also was taught by a wise woman, Sarriah, that the words "in bed" should be added to the end of every fortune. Here is a sampling....
You are kind-hearted and hospitable, cheerful and well-liked. "in bed".
There's a good chance of a romantic encounter soon. "in bed".
You have an unusally magnetic personality. "in bed".
Give a hug to someone who needs one more than you."in bed".
You have a curious smail and a mysterious nature. "in bed".
Never forget a friend especially if he owes you. "in bed".
I always get the Chinese word for star on the back!
Mercury_Maniac
07-02-2003, 11:21 PM
i guess it would say
You are a very unlucky man "in bed"
LixyChick
07-03-2003, 05:40 AM
Oh MM! Come on hun! KARMA!!..........What goes around comes around! You reap what you sow! Put out good vibes and you'll get back good vibes! Try it MM! I promise.......if you try it you might like it!
Um........anyway........what was the question? LOL!
Oh....my cookie! He who farts in church sits in own pew....."in bed"......lmfao! We call that a dutch oven round here! OMG! Going now.............................
BigBear57
07-03-2003, 06:17 AM
Mine should probably say : This meal wasn't the only cat you'll eat tonight so don't complain about ours!
Passion Please
07-03-2003, 06:25 AM
Be open to opportunities that are sure to come your way soon.
Irish
07-03-2003, 08:19 AM
I beleive that fortune is like"good luck".There is NO such thing.You
make your own.If you do the right thing,it will,probably,earn dividends.If you don't,it won't. Irish
skipthisone
07-03-2003, 08:38 AM
This is not your cookie spit it out
gekkogecko
07-03-2003, 10:41 AM
What you fail to realize is that the fortune cookies are already sexual.
You see, aliens have infiltrated the fortune cookie factories are are using the cookies to place personal ads. Those six numbers are a code for finding your potential alien sex partner. They represent:
1. Number of eyestalks.
2. Length of each eyestalk (in units, of course).
3. Number of sex organs.
4. Length/depth of each sex organ (again, in units).
5. Number of planets in home solar system.
6. Distance of home solar system from Earth (in parsecs).
Hope you find your alien lover soon.
Lilith
07-03-2003, 10:49 AM
Woo hoo!!!!!!!
#3. 32
#4 37
HOT DAMN!!!!!!!!
quisath
07-03-2003, 10:52 AM
Dream different dreams while on the same bed.
exhib_it_all
07-03-2003, 01:04 PM
Anything that doesn't kill you...just postpones the inevitable.
Ex
Tipper
07-03-2003, 05:19 PM
"he who drowls from lips, goes home alone"
WildIrish
02-23-2007, 02:46 PM
Today's fortune is:
Your emotional nature is strong and sensitive...in bed. :)
IowaMan
02-23-2007, 03:08 PM
Mine is just as my signature says: "Confucius say, He who masturbate into cash register come into money."
Now all I've got to do is find me a cash register and I'll be one stinking rich S.O.B. :(
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