Irish
07-22-2004, 06:54 PM
Subject: Fwd: How to conquer a bad mood
>
> >
> > You can't read these and stay in a bad mood...
> >
> >
> > 1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
> > Unique Up On It.
> >
> > 2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
> > Tame Way, Unique Up On It.
> >
> > 3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
> > They Take The Psycho Path
> >
> > 4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
> > You Boil The Hell Out Of It.
> >
> > 5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
> > Dam!
> >
> > 6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
> > Polaroid's
> >
> > 7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
> > A Stick
> >
> > 8.. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
> > Nacho Cheese.
> >
> > 9.. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
> > Subordinate Clauses.
> >
> > 10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
> > Quattro Sinko..
> >
> > 11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
> > Spoiled Milk.
> >
> > 12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?
> > Frostbite.
> >
> > 13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
> > A Nervous Wreck.
> >
> > 14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
> > Anyone Can Roast Beef.
> >
> > 15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
> > Right Where You Left Him.
> >
> > 16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
> > Because They Have Big Fingers.
> >
> > 17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
> > Because It Scares The Dog.
> >
> > 18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
> > Sanka.
> >
> > 19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?
> > The Location Of The Dirt Bag.
> >
> > 20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?
> > Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.
> >
> > 21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
> > A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang!
> > A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.
> >
> > 22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?
> > Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer
> >
> > Now, admit it. At least one of these made you smile
>
> >
> > You can't read these and stay in a bad mood...
> >
> >
> > 1. How Do You Catch a Unique Rabbit?
> > Unique Up On It.
> >
> > 2. How Do You Catch a Tame Rabbit?
> > Tame Way, Unique Up On It.
> >
> > 3. How Do Crazy People Go Through The Forest?
> > They Take The Psycho Path
> >
> > 4. How Do You Get Holy Water?
> > You Boil The Hell Out Of It.
> >
> > 5. What Do Fish Say When They Hit a Concrete Wall?
> > Dam!
> >
> > 6. What Do Eskimos Get From Sitting On The Ice too Long?
> > Polaroid's
> >
> > 7. What Do You Call a Boomerang That Doesn't work?
> > A Stick
> >
> > 8.. What Do You Call Cheese That Isn't Yours?
> > Nacho Cheese.
> >
> > 9.. What Do You Call Santa's Helpers?
> > Subordinate Clauses.
> >
> > 10. What Do You Call Four Bullfighters In Quicksand?
> > Quattro Sinko..
> >
> > 11. What Do You Get From a Pampered Cow?
> > Spoiled Milk.
> >
> > 12. What Do You Get When You Cross a Snowman With a Vampire?
> > Frostbite.
> >
> > 13. What Lies At The Bottom Of The Ocean And Twitches?
> > A Nervous Wreck.
> >
> > 14. What's The Difference Between Roast Beef And Pea Soup?
> > Anyone Can Roast Beef.
> >
> > 15. Where Do You Find a Dog With No Legs?
> > Right Where You Left Him.
> >
> > 16. Why Do Gorillas Have Big Nostrils?
> > Because They Have Big Fingers.
> >
> > 17. Why Don't Blind People Like To Sky Dive?
> > Because It Scares The Dog.
> >
> > 18. What Kind Of Coffee Was Served On The Titanic?
> > Sanka.
> >
> > 19. What Is The Difference Between a Harley And a Hoover?
> > The Location Of The Dirt Bag.
> >
> > 20. Why Did Pilgrims' Pants Always Fall Down?
> > Because They Wore Their Belt Buckle On Their Hat.
> >
> > 21. What's The Difference Between a Bad Golfer And a Bad Skydiver?
> > A Bad Golfer Goes, Whack, Dang!
> > A Bad Skydiver Goes Dang! Whack.
> >
> > 22. How Are a Texas Tornado And a Tennessee Divorce The Same?
> > Somebody's Gonna Lose A Trailer
> >
> > Now, admit it. At least one of these made you smile