Wish List (of sorts)

[jennaflower]

I was given an assignment today.. that I am struggling with.. and I need your help.. I am hoping by watching each of you complete the following assignment, it will help me complete mine.

The Assignment:

Make a "wish list" of the things that you are looking for (or looked for if you were lucky enough to find it) in a partner. Yes, I guess they can be general or even superffical.. but I am hoping that you will share deeper things..

I would really really appreciate anyone who can help me with this..

Thanks.

[BigBear57]

Jenna Hon I'm looking for that phantom feeling. I'm sure it exists but it's been so elusive for so long now it's hard to describe. I want a best friend with whom I can share my deepest thoughts. I seek someone I can laugh with even when things are going wrong. I really think the most essential part of the woman I seek is in her hug. Somewhere buried in her arms that feeling hides. I know that inside that embrace there's forever and happily ever after. I just have to find that hug.

[jennaflower]

here is my list so far... (tho it is in the early stages yet)

• Sensitive
• Sense of Humor
• Strong Work Ethic
• Conservative thinker
• Broad Shoulders
• Stocky
• Bald (or full head of hair), no thinning
• Best Friend
• Sexually adventurous
• Intelligent
• Strong Laugh
• Calm (but not boring)

[Lilith]

I want someone who:

is a goofball
is comfortable in a suit or in jeans and a t-shirt
who is eager to please sexually
would put his children before his self
wants to share parenthood and homelife responsibilities
wants to share parenthood and homelife joys
would be willing to try new things (in bed and out)
can deal with my Pixies addiction
loves me (moles, warts, boils, and all:p)
has faith in my abilities
allows him self to be loved

I'll add more later :p

[Steph]

I'm not really looking now so my list might be a bit different than it would be if I were looking.

~gives me space
~vegetarian
~loves folk music
~loves garlic
~grows weed, brews beer & wine
~likes the outdoors & has a cottage in the country *swoon*

I'm sure I could date a guy who liked heavy metal & a steak a day, too. :)

[Catch22]

Tall
Dark
Cute

Wait a minute. Thats me! :)

[BIBI]

^^^^^ hahahahaha

[LixyChick]

I've wished for...

unconditional love...the kind where, even when I say I feel like I look like a witch today, and all I need for it to actually be true is a giant wart with a hair growing out of it...he says, "I'd pluck that hair so I could kiss you".

sexy and sexual
knows own limits but tries new things
major sense of humor
minor sense of style (no black socks and sandals...matter of fact, no socks and sandals PERIOD!)
hygenic and careful about his appearance (no grease under fingernails, no long fingernails or toenails...etc.)
can handle a power tool and knows the difference when it comes to a vibrator (think about it!)

That's about it...I'm pretty easy! LOL!

[jseal]

jennaflower,

Honest
Caring
Faithful
Intelligent
Active

[jennaflower]

Thanks everyone :) You are helping more than you know!! Please keep going.. my sanity may just depend on it. LOL

Hugs.

[Lilith]

OMG I forgot smart...but not that Lord it over you kind or the type that tries to shut you down. Just the kind that makes him easy to talk to and me to believe he is not just puffing up his chest or blowing smoke up my butt.

[osuche]

The non-negotiables, in my mind:

1. Integrity ~ true to himself and others. A stong sense of what is "right."
2. Intelligence ~ Basic curiosity about the world and his place in it.
3. Passion ~ He must have something he is dedicated to. Maybe work, maybe hobbies...but I don't want to be the only thing in his life.
4. Thrifty ~ Must be able to manage a budget and not go into debt. This is a big issue for me because of my past.
5. Opinionated ~ Not an ass, but willing to tell me when he thinks I am full of shit. I want a companion, not a yes-man.
6. Compassionate ~ Cares about others' feelings, thoughts, and experiences.
7. Open minded and willing to experiment ~ Both in bed and out of it.
8. Social Grace ~ He doesn't have to be a male Martha Stewart, but he has to be able to get along with others.
9. Thinks I am wonderful...but is realistic. I have my warts ~ but I want him to love me anyway.

[Pita]

My perfect man would be:

1. Loves me just the way I am but also willing to be flexible when I change.
2. Kind and compassionate
3. Great sense of humor but not the dorky kind.
4. Shares my same faith and views on politics
5. Loves to cook and help around the house
6. Has outside interest of his own (not other women :D)
7. Hard worker but not a work alcoholic
8. Loves sex and is great at knowing just how to please me.
9. Likes to talk about a wide range of topics.
10.Nice looking, well groomed but not fussy.

[Catch22]

So far I wouldn't fit into anyones list. *Is shattered* :(

[WildIrish]

The kind of person I'm drawn to is:

Genuine - doesn't tell me what I wanna hear unless they feel it too

Confident - but not conceited.

Comfortable with my being attracted to them - You know that I think you're sexy but still not totally convinced of it yourself.

Honest - about everything except for my small penis

Maternal - you have to love your kids.

Willing to communicate - I don't care if it's good or bad...just tell me what you're thinking and we'll take it from there.

Socially aware - isn't out to save the world, but they're doing something to preserve their little corner of it because they're realistic in their goals.

Willing to let me cook - because I love to

Understanding of my needs - but strong enough to speak up for yours

Adventurous - Sexually and otherwise

Fun - because I am too.

And the most important of all? You have to love me back!

[WildIrish]

Damn...there's more

Loves to sing, dance, listen to music, walk on the beach and hold hands while our feet get wet, build sandcastles with the kids, eat ice cream, look for rainbows, cuddle up with me and drink cocoa when it's chilly, sleep late, kiss me in the morning, say bless you when I sneeze, let me scrub your back in the tub, get my jokes, and understand what I mean no matter how I say it!


More to be posted as it comes to me.

[Catch22]

WI you would need twins to have all that.

[WildIrish]

WI you would need twins to have all that.


Or at least sisters! :D

[jennaflower]

Here are more for my list:

• Considerate
• Non-Smoker
• Mischievous Twinkle in his eyes
• Cuddles
• Non-Controlling
• Kind
• Attentive
• Romantic
• Realistic
• Forgiving
• Tolerant
• Expressive
• Strong Hands

[dicksbro]

I'm trying to think back almost 44 years when I first met my wife. We dated for three years and I think the things that so appealed to me was her kindness, her love and devlotion to me (as mine was for her), a shared set of religious beliefs, a love of the outdoors, and other interests.

44 years later, I still think I made the right choice. ;)

[Lilith]

Need to add.... protective but non-violent

[Oldfart]

I need to be able to look into her eyes and see the intelligence, look into her heart

and see the warmth and look into her fridge and see the red wine.

[jennaflower]

Wonderful responses.. from wonderful sexy people :)

Keep posting..... :) I need more input..

[osuche]

Someone that understands my ups and downs.....who can be philosophical and talk about issues removed from emotions....but still have strong emotions about *me*

[Catch22]

I must be to easy going. I just want someone that doesn't chew tobacoo or fart the national anthem of Uruguay.

[Vullkan]

I wish-->>

For a lady who will let me work as hard as I wish.......
An intellect equal or greater then my own......
An adventurer, sexually, and emotionally........
A lady strong and independant......
One with an never ending appetite for life........
A woman to keep me guessing......
But most of all one that would give me cause to wish to return home and long every moment to be with her

[jennaflower]

here is more of my list:

• Protective
• Understanding
• Honest
• Rugged
• Positive
• Thoughtful
• Down to Earth
• Approachable
• Stimulating
• Insatiable
• Strong
• Truthful
• Sincere
• Passionate
• Tender
• Sensible
• Level headed
• Communicative
• Accepting
• Friendly
• Sociable

[Midnight Kiss]

Someone who:
loves unconditionally and allows himself to be loved the same
puts family before all else
can go with the flow and is willing to be spur of the moment
allows me to be myself and can put up with my many moods
is honest
has strong work ethics
has a sense of humor and is not afraid to let his silly side show
loves the outdoors and animals
is intelligent but doesn’t talk down his nose at those who are clueless
is open minded and willing to listen to all sides, doesn’t have to always agree, but be willing to hear it
is willing to experiment whether it be a new recipe I have fixed or a new “game” I have read about at pixies J
is not ashamed of a little bit (or a lot) of public affection
is extremely patient
is caring and kind
likes surprises and likes to surprise
is my best friend
is romantic at heart even if he doesn’t let anyone but me know it

[Lilith]

Needs to be a "follow-through" person. I really like being able to depend on someone's word.

[jaybee from UK]

Great idea for a thread.

Ok...


Physical:

Green eyes;
Thunder thighs;
6'1" (over half of it leg);
Well developed figure/musculature;
Quite willing and able to flip me over when she wants to 'drive'.

Xena Warrior Princess would be a good start..

:)

Now for the best part...

Personality attributes;

Has to be able to see the bright side, especially when I can't;

Affectionate to a fault - and not scared of public displays;

As ruthlessly realistic as I am, but with an equally powerful hopefulness;

Playful - should happily smear my nose with whipped cream in a 100 a head restaurant;

Understands that my tears at seeing her cry are not a weakness on my part, simply my distress at failing to shield her from life's occasional horror;

Razor sharp, biting wit - of which I'm the occasional target - but always a loving goodwill beneath the humour;

Not only find most of my jokes excruciatingly funny, but ALSO be able to tell a joke;

My most loyal fan;

Must NOT be a chick-flick addict (Hey, the nearest to a war movie you'll see on my shelf is 'Shaving Ryans Privates'!) although a fellow film buff would be fantastic;

A square by day, a bohemian by night...works hard, yet never forgets why.

There's much more, but it's late....

Once again, brilliant thread!



Jaybee.

[cowgirltease]

I WANT..........
A lover not a fighter
someone who feels confident and not insecure
who isn't jealous
who doesn't fart in bed :rolleyes:
gives compliments instead of degrading statements
isn't afraid I'll dress them funny when we go shopping in a mens clothing store :p
A daddy for my daughter who's willing to teach her things.
who doesn't hate my animals cause you'll go before they do!
who isn't afraid to put in a days work on the farm
love me for who I am and not try to stop me from posting on pixies cause I ain't goin nowhere! ;)
willing to try new things with me in bed
will give me my "me" time when I need it
is able to carry on a conversation with me
isn't afraid to say I'm sorry when they are wrong
Treat me like a lady that I am ( I'm just a naughty lady) LOL
Make me proud to be with them in public
Dance with me!
That can ride a damn horse for christs sake!

[jennaflower]

Okay.. this is the complete list.. as of this moment.. a few more hours til my deadline.. so I might still improve on it.. but.. here goes.. input welcome..

• Sensitive: Wears his heart on his sleeve, but controls them when he should.
• Sense of Humor: Enjoys laughter and makes me laugh.
• Strong Work Ethic: Gainfully employed.
• Conservative thinker: Moderate Republican (but doesn’t stick to party lines)
• Broad Shoulders: Both emotionally and figuratively
• Stocky: Not overly tall, certainly not overly thin.
• Bald (or full head of hair), no thinning. Like extremes.
• Best Friend: Someone I can share all aspects of myself, without fear of rejection.
• Sexually adventurous: Isn’t afraid to try new things.
• Intelligent: Can hold an intelligent conversation on a whole range of subjects.
• Strong Laugh: A laugh that starts from within, not surface or fake.
• Calm (but not boring): Remains calm under pressure. Handles stress well.
• Considerate: Thinks of others feelings.
• Non-Smoker: Can’t handle that smell on his body.
• Mischievous Twinkle in his eyes: Can’t explain this one.. it is just there.
• Cuddles: Enjoys cuddling
• Non-Controlling: Will not control me, but will offer his suggestions.
• Kind: Gentle heart
• Attentive: Pays attention to my needs
• Romantic: Appreciates romance and is at least willing to make the effort.
• Realistic: Not overly optimistic.. but not pessimistic either..
• Forgiving: Is accepting of my faults and loves me anyway.
• Tolerant: Doesn’t irritate easily.
• Expressive: Shows his emotions, and isn’t afraid of public displays of affection.
• Strong Hands: To hold mine, to keep me grounded.
• Protective: Will protect me (and us) against whatever he can.
• Understanding: Is willing to listen and accept new ideas.
• Honest: Believes that honesty is a key to a successful relationship.
• Rugged: Is more comfortable in blue jeans than in slacks.
• Positive: Always sees the brighter side to everything.
• Thoughtful: Realizes the importance of “little things”.
• Down to Earth: Does not believe he is better than anyone else.
• Approachable: Does not put an emotional wall up.
• Stimulating: Both intellectually and sexually.
• Insatiable: Always wants more (especially me)
• Strong: Not just physically, but emotionally as well.
• Truthful: Believes that the truth matters.
• Sincere: Never phony or fake.
• Passionate: About the things that he loves.
• Tender: A teddy bear at heart.
• Sensible: Level headed
• Communicative: Is willing to talk things over and not sandbag his emotions and thoughts. If he is unhappy or wants more.. is willing to express that.
• Friendly: Greets everyone with smiles… eager to make new friends.
• Sociable: Enjoys moments with friends (both new and old)
• Stable: both economically and emotionally
• Reliable: Will do what he says he will… will be where he says he will be..
• Fun: Enjoys having a good time with those that are around him.
• Exciting: Always looking for new ways to spice up life.
• Faithful: Wants only me
• Integrity: Doesn’t go against the things that he believes in.
• Confident: But not cocky.
• Spontaneous: Doesn’t always stick to a schedule
• Makes time for me.
• Embraces my son, my family, and my friends.
• Understands the stressful aspects of my job.
• Enjoys weekends away
• Likes the outdoors
• Will share an evening home, watching videos as we cuddle on the couch.
• Likes Surprises (both giving and receiving).
• Patient: Both in and out of bed.
• Likes his own space.
• Stays in touch with old friends.

[Loulabelle]

If I had created such a list, and expected my future partner to have had many of the 'basic' qualities ticked off (a job, a driving license, likes lots of different foods, seriously big on travelling, doesn't live at home with parents etc etc) then I would never have got together with Fussy.

When I first met him in real life, I told him that we were totally unsuitable for each other, since all of the above things were important to me in finding a partner (as well as all the emotional and 'deeper' things). If he'd been applying for a job as 'my boyfriend' he wouldn't even have got to the interview stage.

However, I liked Fussy inspite of myself, and fell in love with him for who he is.....he is my soul mate and that's what's important.

I would strongly advise anyone against creating a wish list for the person they want in their lives, and instead, would urge people to create a wishlist for the type of person they want to be. If you are the best person you can be, you'll attract the best people you could possibly wish for.

[BIBI]

I would strongly advise anyone against creating a wish list for the person they want in their lives, and instead, would urge people to create a wishlist for the type of person they want to be. If you are the best person you can be, you'll attract the best people you could possibly wish for.

Everyone has a wish list. It may not be one that is on paper to read everyday, but somewhere in the recesses of our minds there is a list. There has to be. We all want to meet someone who is compatible with our ethics, morals and beliefs. We all want someone who is a positive addition to our life, not a hinderence.Someone who makes us happy and visa versa. There is always a wish list

As far as being the best person you can be. I think most people try to be the best they can be, but that doesn't guarantee anything. I wish it were as simple as that....

How many of us have met people that we think are wonderful only to find out that they aren't? Everyone I bet, and the reason we tend to dismiss them from our inner circle is because they do not live up to what we, for lack of a better word, have on our "list".

[osuche]

You know, I tend to be pretty damn picky when it comes to men. I have a tendency to be friends with men I would date....maybe not marry, but date....and if they don't meet that criteria then they are not in my inner circle of friends. Sounds kinda mean, but I find that the first criteria for dating is that the person be my friend, so the converse is also true.

Lou ~ my guess is that you maybe hadn't made the right list. There are some shallow things that are just "window dressing" (like having a driver's license), but the really important things DO matter. My guess is that Fussy met all the "non-negotiables."

[Lilith]

Some people also believe that you can't attract what you want unless you know what that is. And that sometimes you miss out on someone having many of those attributes because you were not aware that they were high on the priority list. It can also help people who consistently make bad choices in partners ( my mom:p) to look at what they want in a partner vs. what they have chosen in the past. Then they can reflect on why they make those choices. Repeatedly, consistently, over and over and over :spin:

[BIBI]

Jenna,

Don't forget "employed" ;)

[Catch22]

She has Working on the list BiBi.

Jenna, are you using this list for your project? To my mind some of the things cancel each other out.

[jaybee from UK]

Okay.. this is the complete list.. .


Jenn,

It would be nice if you could add some weightings to each of the criteria, both for your study and us. Also, your list leans towards female wishes...perhaps that's why I don't see 'Thunder Thighs' !!

:)

(Just thought of a great idea for a new thread...)


Jaybee.

[BIBI]

[QUOTE=Catch22]She has Working on the list BiBi[QUOTE]

Well spank me silly!!! :spank:

I made a boo boo! :rolleyes:

.....and so did you! lol :)

[Catch22]

[QUOTE=Catch22]She has Working on the list BiBi[QUOTE]

Well spank me silly!!! :spank:

I made a boo boo! :rolleyes:

.....and so did you! lol :)

Does that mean we get a picnic basket for being booboo? :p

[BIBI]

:) @ ^^^^^^^

[jennaflower]

Thanks for the great responses...

Lou.. making a "wish list" about yourself... characteristics that I need to further develop within myself is a fantastic idea... and I will begin working on such a list.. I think it will work well within this weeks assignment actually.. so I thank you..

BIBI... ROFL.. believe me.. employed is a "non-negotiable". I have never found myself remotely attracted to anyone who is unable (unwilling) to work. I grew up in a home where a work ethic was pounded in early.

osuche.. I read your post.. and could completely relate.. I have several very close male friends.. that I would certainly date.. but alas.. I am the only single one in my crowd.. :(

Lilith.. that is almost exactly what I was told.. as to why the assignment was given to me... did you copy that out of a text book? LOL.. I am NOT a text book case... LOLOLOL.. far from it.

Catch22.. this is part of an ongoing project... ME... I have begun trying to deal with my issues with a professional.. in an attempt to rid myself of excess (unattractive) baggage.. this is just the beginning.. of a long road.

Jaybee.. Thunder thighs.. don't my kind of thing.. LOL.. but I am thankful they are yours :)

Hugs.. and sooo much thanks..

[fzzy]

When I was young I made a list -- it would have been impossible for anyone to meet all the criteria, because somethings absolutely cancelled each other out (that was when I was very young!)

When I was in my late 20's I made another list, not really written down, but still it was a list I made and have carried it in my head ever since .... but having never written it down, I found it very difficult to sit down and do so .... strange how our minds work isn't it ....

Strong - emotionally, spiritually, mentally, personally ... and physically wouldn't be bad either.

Caring - about me, about my inner circle, about things that really matter (in my opinion)

Integrity (I think this really goes with the Strong, but it's very important to me)

That certain spark that kind of just sets my teeth (and various other parts) (and his as well) all atingle.

Beyond that, for me, just about everything else is negotiable. :)

[cowgirltease]

Some people also believe that you can't attract what you want unless you know what that is. And that sometimes you miss out on someone having many of those attributes because you were not aware that they were high on the priority list. It can also help people who consistently make bad choices in partners ( my mom:p) to look at what they want in a partner vs. what they have chosen in the past. Then they can reflect on why they make those choices. Repeatedly, consistently, over and over and over :spin:


LILITH..........you just told my life story.
Maybe I'll get it right this time. ;)

[Steph]

LILITH..........you just told my life story.
Maybe I'll get it right this time. ;)


You're Lilith's mom? :jester: :eek: :fish:

I kid! It seems like you've got a great guy now, my dear.