Which Gender more likely to explore

[Jax]

So...been wondering about this kind of old age question. When it really comes down to it, which gender do you think is more likely to explore same sex contact? I think men want to hear it is women, but is that reality, or is that just a fantasy? Just wondering about your thoughts on this topic today.

[Loulabelle]

I think that in general men can't separate sexual experimentation with another man from anal experimentation so it depends on their feelings on anal stimulation. Women tend to look at same sex contact as more of a loving experimental thing without necessarily focussing on any particular act, which means they are a lot less threatened by same sex contact than men are. Of course there's also the fact that some women are attracted to lesbian contact as they know it will stimulate their men/man. I have a friend who considers herself in no way to be bisexual but who used to 'snog' her friend when they were out to get men to buy them drinks.

In general I think that more women would probably experiment than men, but most would be happy for it to be a one-off. For those guys who are actually interested in same sex contact, I think it's more likely that if they enjoy the experience, they will want to repeat it on a regular/ semi-regular basis, despite not necessarily being interested in an emotional relationship with another man.

[Eastern]

I think woman are probably more open to the idea.. i thik men are all scared of the homophobe thing

[IowaMan]

I'm really not sure. I can see a man and acknowledge that he's good looking but I can't say I've actually ever been turned on by a guy. Just not wired that way I guess.

[osuche]

I believe women are more likely to experiment too, but there are closeminded women out there.

[WildIrish]

I'd be very willing to experiment with Brad Pitt. :D

Moreso than Mrs. WI would be with Angelina or Jennifer.

[Lilith]

I believe women are more likely to experiment too, but there are closeminded women out there.

While I fail to see how not experimenting with the same sex equals closemindedness, I too think women are more likely to have intimate encounters with other women. I think there are several reasons for it and those reasons probably vary in each case.

[citrus]

I feel it's about an equal split for a couple of years from early puberty until more peer pressures begin heaping themselves upon the youthful psyche. After that time I think slightly more males percentage-wise carry the questions, "I wonder if his cock is bigger than mine? I wonder what uncircumcised would feel like? I wonder what it feels like to have a guy suck me to cum? I wonder what the skin feels like to the lips and tongue? Can I just get a blow job and not turn homo? It's usually about Him wondering what someone else on his cock would be like and less often it's about His mouth on another guys cock! Yipe! Then He'd think He's gone gay. :yikes:

I have a friend whom is definitely NOT gay, Yet when we sucked each other off twice each. I know him. He aint gay. We were youthful experimenters.

[Casperr]

Really interesting question. I would say at this point in time, women are far more likely to experiment than men, simply because it's more socially acceptable - encouraged, even - than it is for men to experiment.
But I think if you remove the societal attitudes from the equation, it becomes much more fifty-fifty. Humans are sexual creatures, we are wired to be sexual and as part of our sexuality many of both genders explore out of curiousity.

But at the moment society and culture says "Two women = good, two men = shocking and controversial".

[dicksbro]

A lot of interesting thoughts, here, and I suspect they all work into the equation.

Probably Casper's comments ring close to my view ... current social norms make same sex contact far less acceptable for men than women. Remove that barrier and it may be more 50-50.

Social norms aside, today the fear or concern for AIDS, I'm sure, has an impact, too.

[souls_cry2000]

I also believe that women are more likely to experiment in this regard. Loulabelle makes a valid point about many women doing it to spark the sex drive of their male counterparts. I know that it stimulates me in some respects to think of Chrissy experimenting in this regard. However I'm not sure how much the reality of it does.

[Oldfart]

Girls who are close friends are more likely to cuddle in a non-sexual (mostly) way, giving greater leeway for experimentation than boys who are discouraged from early years from male intimacy.

[Loulabelle]

I'm not sure that society is more accepting of female homosexuality than male.

I know a hell of a lot more 'out and proud' male celebrities than female.

I would say that female sexuality has been largely ignored rather than accepted in today's world. The stereotype of women 'suffering sex' lives on and the fascination of lesbianism for a lot of men, I think, is women behaving sexually, purely for the purposes of pleasure, not for the purposes of procreation or some kind of obligation to a male partner.

I would also argue that a lot of women have a far more negative view of their genitals (and therefore other women's genitals) than your average bloke, having been indoctrinated with associations of 'dirtiness' 'smelliness' and shame from an early age.

Society accepts that 'boys will play with themselves' and even that they will take sexual stimulation where they can get it (all those jokes about prisons and the Navy) but that girl's shouldn't be sexual until they reach the age of consent and even then it should be with someone they love.

As OF says, women have been allowed to show initimacy with other women in the past as it was assumed that such intimacy was not sexual, but sisterly/motherly. This has allowed for greater experimentation perhaps, as society is less quick to judge woman as a 'lesbian' but rather as 'confused' or 'just being silly'. Society, on the other hand labels a man 'queer' if he so much as kisses another man on the cheek in English speaking cultures, because we stereotype men as not being able to have physical intimacy without sex. Men fight an uphill struggle to prove that not everything they do is sexually motivated, in a way that women are fighting at the opposite end of the spectrum.

There is a lot of work to be done, in both directions I think. Women need to be accepted as sexual in themselves rather than sex objects and men need to be freed from their sexual stereotypes in order to be more physically intimate with their peers, even if they're not on a sport's field.

[WildIrish]

Men fight an uphill struggle to prove that not everything they do is sexually motivated, in a way that women are fighting at the opposite end of the spectrum.


Wow...that's a great line!

[Wicked Wanda]

In my experience, men are much much less likely to explore. I think that at least 3/4 of all women will admit to at least thinking about it.

I suppose I should qualify this. My knowledge of men's attitudes has been limited to conversations, overhead and face to face, about how they want to avoid any sign of "gayness". More directly, most men, during a 3SUM (or moresum) really work to avoid any contact with the other man, sometimes to the point of sillyness.
Things like taking turns to avoid any chance of contact (see my tale "bad sex isn't pretty") to oh so carefully manuevering about the bed so as not to touch one another... well, I spent a lot of time giggling. (carefully- never laugh at a man during sex, he can get very mean and even dangerous!)

The second part, women's attitudes, comes from direct, personal experience. Almost any woman visting NOLA from out of town that I met could be persuaded to explore. Sometimes it took a lot of conversation, and a little alcohol, (just a LITTLE, falling down drunk partners are no fun, and it's immoral to take advantage, and illegal too) to learn that she wanted to explore her "other side". I was always happy to lead the way, and had fun doing it. I also learned that I had to be careful. So much so I eventually avoided married women all together.
Too many women in poor relationships, mostly women who felt ignored, belittled, or who were sexually starved, became too attached, and didn't want to leave to go home! Sometimes, to my horror, they would anounce plans to leave hubby and move in with me!
Funny thing, looking back, I do miss opening that door for so many women.
I haven't been anyone's "first" for a while.

Love,

WW

[mikaylasmummy]

I agree with what Eastern said about men are more likely to me scared of the homophobe thing.
Deep down I think that both sexs are equally willing to explose the same sex but that being said women are alot more open to the idea

[Loulabelle]

Funny thing, looking back, I do miss opening that door for so many women.
I haven't been anyone's "first" for a while.


Damnit with you and your rules! First no online meetings and now no married women either! What would it take to change your mind?!?!?!?! You'd be my first..... ;) :D

[WildIrish]

Damnit with you and your rules! First no online meetings and now no married women either! What would it take to change your mind?!?!?!?! You'd be my first..... ;) :D


Um...I'd like to be there to see that, please? I promise not to make any noise!



Except the splatter of my manjuice hitting the ceiling, of course. :hot:

[Aqua]

I have a friend that very adamantly denied ever jerking off because he equated that to being gay. Or at least assumed that everyone else would believe that, and he was (still is a bit) homophobic.

[Casperr]

Damnit with you and your rules! First no online meetings and now no married women either! What would it take to change your mind?!?!?!?! You'd be my first..... ;) :D
I know how you feel Lou - she also has a 'no bi men' rule too :(

[Travelinguy]

Part of the reason guys are typically so unwilling to explore the same sex is what society has placed on being gay. How many times growing up do boys call other guys "faggot" or "you fag" or any other term not really calling somebody gay, just using the term as a bad thing. You never hear girls doing that to other girls.

Also, here is another big reason in my opnion. Guys love the thought of 2 girls having sex. VERY few guys are not atleast a little turned on at the thought. But on the opposite end, girls are typically not turned on at the concept of two guys having sex. While a few guys may not care much about 2 girls having sex, many women are repulsed by the idea. Just my thoughts

[ReaperWoman]

Part of the reason guys are typically so unwilling to explore the same sex is what society has placed on being gay. How many times growing up do boys call other guys "faggot" or "you fag" or any other term not really calling somebody gay, just using the term as a bad thing. You never hear girls doing that to other girls.

Also, here is another big reason in my opnion. Guys love the thought of 2 girls having sex. VERY few guys are not atleast a little turned on at the thought. But on the opposite end, girls are typically not turned on at the concept of two guys having sex. While a few guys may not care much about 2 girls having sex, many women are repulsed by the idea. Just my thoughts

In my personal experience, girls can get called derogatory names such as "dyke" but it usually suggests butch-ness more than anything else. Being a gay woman is definately not any more or less accepted than being a gay man, here at least.

The second point though is something I agree on completely though. When I started telling people I was bi, I had no fear that my many male friends were going to be anything other than insanely happy for me. The idea that they were friends with a girl who not only fancied other girls, but wasn't off their market... Let's just say they were happy. :p But when you ask any of my female friends (though they are few and far between) what they think of MM action, from the true vanillas right through, the answer is usually negative.


Personally, it turns me on. A lot. :D

[Loulabelle]

Me too Reaperwoman!

I think a lot of women haven't even thought properly about the idea of two guy together....what did your friends think of 'Brokeback Mountain'? I wonder if that film has allowed some women to see MM action in a new light?

[wyndhy]

you can add me to the drool list too. mmmmmmmmm.