Jepoardy is now playing....

[dicksbro]

What did he say after, "I did the flicking and then the licking?"

Your turn.

[south]

What did the tag team bang fest member say to his team member after the Viagra wore off?

...so are the days of our lives.

[dicksbro]

When the young lover commented how beautiful he thought their lovemaking had been, what was her reply?

Vidi, Vinci, Veni
(I saw, I conquered, I came)

[jseal]

What did Julius Caesar say about his conquest of Gaul?


The thing speaks for itself.

[thereIam]

What does my answering machine do?

Rich and creamy

[dicksbro]

How would you describe the owner of Borden's Milk Factory?

Soft and tender ..

[musicman]

what is a romantic night at home

chocoholic

[jseal]

What are many Pixies ladies?


Lots of makeup.

[musicman]

what is not necessary for beauty?

milk duds

[jseal]

What do you call ineffective dairy explosives?


Extravagant claims.

[thereIam]

What is the EU saying about Microsoft?

The wet spot.

[musicman]

what is the best spot to create?

jumpin jehosephat!

[jseal]

What did the other checkers player do to beat jehosephat?

A mirror finish.

[osuche]

What did I mess up when I had sex on my car hood?

A big bore engine

[dicksbro]

What is a big dildo with a vibrator?

Send in the clowns

[osuche]

What does one do when you want WildIrish to leave the building?

Smiley face

[jseal]

What do you NOT see these days in the Bush Administration?


Flows like oil.

[osuche]

WHat does blood do through my veins?

Lackluster response.

[jseal]

What do I get from my wife?


Blame it on me.

[thereIam]

Name one standard response to a problem.

Click here.

[dicksbro]

What was the theme of the "Confidence Building Seminar?"

Only you

[jseal]

Who can prevent forest fires?


Best of the best.

[musicman]

who is my wife?

hundreds came to see it

[jseal]

What happened when my children offered to help?

Unrequited love.

[musicman]

what do some people believe to be a fairy tale?


rocky 5000

[dicksbro]

What is the typical way to describe Illinois roads by the mile?

[jseal]

dicksbro,

I'll supply the answer.



In broad daylight.

[dicksbro]

Thanks jseal.

When should a person sleep who's been up all night having sex?

The tunnel of love

[thereIam]

Name one dark, damp place that is nice to visit.

Better living through chemistry.

[jseal]

What is the claim of the street drug trade?


Forever yours.

[flutelady]

How did Herpes sign the card he sent.



Ten o'clock.

[jseal]

When do they roll up the sidewalks in Toledo, Ohio?



Final four.

[flutelady]

What will they be announcing on American Idol in 5 more weeks?


Two lumps, please

[way22hot]

what did the transvestite ask her plastic surgoen

Dr. Feelgood

[jseal]

What did the nympho ask her obstetrician to do to her?


General admission.

[dicksbro]

What slogan did the senior protitute have on her business card?

It's Howdy Dowdy time!

[way22hot]

What is the sewer workers creed?

maximum protection

[jseal]

What does an inch thick condom provide?


Soft and silky.

[dicksbro]

What did the penis say to the lube?

Sex is better than logic.

[rockintime]

What was it the ancient Greeks found out that caused a major change in their society?


It felt like a roller coaster ride.

[Sugarsprinkles]

How would I describe the best sex I've ever had?





The Stanley Cup

[dicksbro]

What did Stanley have to wear when playing football?

Low bridge ahead ...

[musicman]

What did figuring out what the sign said as your drove under the bridge and left the top of your car on the side you entered from?

YIKES!

[dicksbro]

What did the "Young Indian Kiltmakers Encouragement Society" use as it's acronym?

Taxes

[musicman]

what does the government waste on the wrong things?

heck of a day

[dicksbro]

When things go right or things go wrong, what's a good common answer? :D

Cigarettes and whiskey and wild, wild women ...

[jseal]

What was my life many years ago?


Perhaps next time.

[dicksbro]

:( Story of my life.




:D :D JK


Happy days are here again!

[jseal]

What do we all hope for but don’t expect?


With the left hand.

[dicksbro]

When his right hand was hurt, how did he masturbate?

Going for a ride.

[jseal]

What did she say she was about to do, as she smiled in anticipation?


Been there. Done that.

[dicksbro]

What did the shy young man hear when he first went to see a prostitute?

Hail, hail, the gang's all here.

[jseal]

What did the stranded lady hear from the Hell's Angels gang just before...



Maybe, maybe not.

[dicksbro]

What is the procrastinator's idea of a definite answer?

Pass the salt.

[jseal]

What do you do a few hours after eating too much salt?


The one and only.

[Sugarsprinkles]

What is a good description of Lilith?






Too Good to Be True

[dicksbro]

What's a good description of SS? ;)

Jack and Jill ...

[Sugarsprinkles]

Who found better things to do up on that hill besides fetching a damned pail of water??



Little Boy Blue

[dicksbro]

Little Boy Blue really preferred it when his horn was blown. :rolleyes:

Hi diddle diddle

[Sugarsprinkles]

What do most Pixie's men do as they perv at the women's pics??




The Stanley Cup

[dicksbro]

What was Stanley looking for as he suited up for the football game?

What's for dinner?

[musicman]

what question is asked far too often in my house?

frankie fingers

[jseal]

What did Mrs. Frankie feel when she bent over?

The long and the short of it.

[dicksbro]

What did she call it when the ape man and the midget did a double penetration number on her?

[Sugarsprinkles]

and your next "answer" db???

[dicksbro]

:D :D Continuing where I left off ....

[jseal]

What did the Master say to his slave when he returned?



Not now Dear.

[dicksbro]

What did the husband say to the wife who remembered a phone call she wanted to make right in the middle of their lovemaking?

Let your fingers do the walking ...

[musicman]

What did the yellow pages agent ay to her client when she was trying to sell him ad space?

forever and for always

[jseal]

Who is my wife?


This won't hurt much.

[dicksbro]

What did the spider say to the fly?

Things go better with Coke.

[jseal]

What do the crack heads say?


One for the road.

[musicman]

what does it sometimes take before I leave home for work? LOL

2 down, 3 to go

[dicksbro]

What's meant by 40%?

Don't confuse me with facts.

[jseal]

What do Politicians say?


Lazy. Lazy. Lazy.

[dicksbro]

What, respectively, did the turtle say to the snail; the rabbit to the turtle, and the cheetah to the rabbit when they finished the race?

Hamburger, fries and a Coke, please.

[kinx]

What will I hear most if I lose my current job?

________


Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.

[musicman]

what forms of transportation would I use to get me to some hot sex?


hello, how are ya? I'm arnold horshack! He he he

[thereIam]

What is the one line guaranteed NOT to get you laid?

Millions for defense, but not one cent for tribute.

[Glyndwr]

What is the Dallas Cowboys player wages budget?

A steel rule and a bag of marshmallows

[fzzy]

What is camping out with minimalist attitude?

Seven hands curled into each other

[dicksbro]

What would a major argument in sign language look like?

First little piggy went to market ...

[jseal]

"May I have some more of those delicious pork chops?"


What a dump!

[musicman]

what is the basement at the store I work at?

holy hooters batman!

[jseal]

What did Robin say about the Priestess?


Sharp left ahead.

[way22hot]

what did the conductor tell the orchestra?
Easy money

[dicksbro]

What did the prostitute find waiting for her when she walked in on the "Association of Lonesome Guys" convention?

What's for dinner?

[south]

What is french for howyoudoin'?

Tied and dyed

[dicksbro]

What two words came to mind when the poet attempted to rhyme with tried and spied.

Two bits, four bits, six bits a dollar ...

[musicman]

how did the stupid guy try to negotiate with the hooker?

yum yum yum

[dicksbro]

What did the tongue say when it met Ms. Vagina?

It's gonna' blow.

[Sugarsprinkles]

What did the penis say to the hot, wet mouth?




American Idol

[WildIrish]

What do you get when you leave your AMC Pacer running with nobody in it?


Hair Plugs

[jseal]

What are advertisements for follicle rejuvenation therapies?


Never on a Sunday.

[musicman]

what is the one day of the week i really hate working?

four score and seven years ago

[dicksbro]

What did the 87-year-old answer when asked about his birthday?

Good ideas should be encouraged.

[musicman]

what do I think when my wife brings up having sex more than once a day?

the caramilk secret

[dicksbro]

What makes little Escorts grow up into Crown Vics?

A good blowjob is the answer.

[musicman]

what is always the right question?

potash and kindling

[dicksbro]

What's another way to describe the result of a young woody getting all hot and bothered?

Stick it in, stick it in!

[jseal]

What does every man fantasize every woman saying to him?


“You’re dead meat!”

[dicksbro]

What did the vagina say to the penis when it went flacid?

Making up is half the fun.

[jseal]

What did one Queen say to the other in the Ladies room?


It isn’t in here.

[dicksbro]

What did the young man say to his inexperienced lover when she reached into his shirt pocket?

Spread 'em wide.

[wyndhy]

What is rule #3 in "How to Make the Best of Your Arrest"

They are always stuck inside the same hole.

[dicksbro]

Why do warn people Super Glue can be dangerous if one's not careful?

Soft and smooth.

[jseal]

What is a freshly shaved pussy?


It goes in hard and dry and comes out soft and wet.

[dicksbro]

What is cereal? :)

probing and pulsing

[boilergirl1]

what is your cock?


trembles when tweaked

[dicksbro]

What are "Kibbles and Bits" or is that "Nipples and Clits"? :D

Crunchy on the outside ...

[boilergirl1]

what is creamy on the inside?



looks soft b4.......

[dicksbro]

What preceeds foreplay?

Creampies

[boilergirl1]

what are things that get eaten?


gobstoppers








pm DB?

[dicksbro]

What are corks and condoms? :D

(Got your PM ... got my reply? :D)

Twinkies

[boilergirl1]

what is a cream-filled pie?



nut stuffed

[dicksbro]

What is a chipmunk?

Back end up

[Sugarsprinkles]

what is a great position for sex?





slap and tickle

[dicksbro]

What is Lilith's idea of "stick" and "carrot?"

Sparkle and shine ...

[BIGbad]

What is the brand name of the latest chemical hair remover?

Stiff and hot...

[dicksbro]

What is a "Spicey Slim Jim?"

The calm before the storm.

[musicman]

what is that moment right befor orgasm?

just the way you are

[dicksbro]

What is the state I like my lover to be in?

Anyone got a ticket?

[jseal]

What did a cross-country racing driver say to the others after the race was over?


I’ve never seen one quite like that.

[musicman]

what did the hooker say to her john?

jellyfish

[wyndhy]

what is the secret services new codeword for "bush has made an as of himself again"

a lumpy mule

[musicman]

what did my old mattress feel like?

corned beef and hash

[rockintime]

What's a good food and drug mix for the party?


Steel balls

[jseal]

What do some ladies have?


Anytime at all.

[dicksbro]

What is my favorite time for sex?

I think I feel sick.

[jseal]

Do you know how much gas costs?


Not In My Back Yard.

[rockintime]

Where did Pres. Bush say not to have the Clinton family reunion?


Reach a little higher please.

[dicksbro]

What did the basketball star tell the midget to do if he wanted to play better defensive basketball?

Oh, yeah, in there, please.

[skipthisone]

What did the secretary tell her boss after he locked his office.


Strippers are us!!

[musicman]

what is the best store I've ever been in?

jumpin' jack flash

[dicksbro]

What did they call the hyperactive exhibitionist male?

Bingo!

[jseal]

What do you hear just before you hear three old ladies say "Damn!”?


One last one please.

[dicksbro]

What did the debt-ridden prostitute ask for?

There's no business like show business.

[south]

What is the Exhibitionist Credo?


Sumt, Sumuttering, and Porn

[Sugarsprinkles]

Name the The Three Horny Mice





Mu Shu Pork

[rockintime]

How would you order a cow to frighten a pig away?



The check's in the mail.

[Sugarsprinkles]

What is the wrong way to pay a hooker?





King Arthur

[jseal]

Who did Sir Lancelot cuckold?


A piece of cake.

[dicksbro]

When his inflatable doll sprang a leak, what did the birthday boy turn to?

Strawberry shortcake

[jseal]

Who was Truly Scrumptious’s secret lover in “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang”?


“I’ve got a bad feeling about this.”

[musicman]

what emotion is going through one's head when they get home and realize they've forgotten their anniversary?

today is gonna be the day

[dicksbro]

What did the sub say when he saw the enema bottle and a butt plug?

Perfectly intense

[jseal]

What was the judgment by the language instructor of the verbs in the test sentence?


“I’ll try anything once!”

[dicksbro]

When confronted with several beautiful, sexy, horny ladies ... what is the typical, understated British response?

When in Rome ...

[osuche]

What did the pope say at the brothel?

If I only had a brain

[jseal]

What did Dr. Frankenstein say to Igor?


Make it a stiff one please.

[rockintime]

What did the creators of Viagra ask of those testing their product.



A midsummer night's dream

[jseal]

What are all the Pixie ladies lined up waiting for me?



It was a little bit too wide.

[dicksbro]

What was wrong with the "Hummer" when it reached the one-lane bridge?

Put it where?

[osuche]

What did John Kerry say to his wife the first time they had sex? :p

Sounds like a baaaaad idea

[dicksbro]

What did the ram say to the country bumpkin who wanted to play the part of the ewe?

I'm cummmmiiiiinnnnnggggg!

[osuche]

What is my favorite statement in the whole wide world?


I am a nature fan

[rockintime]

What is a favorite claim of a nudist?



it's bouncing higher and higher.

[jseal]

What did the bankrupt say about one of his checks?



It can’t miss.

[dicksbro]

Why did the nut attach a spray attachment to his cock during sex?

The sun is coming up.

[osuche]

What starts a cock crying?


Pretty in pink

[dicksbro]

What's a delicate way of describing penetration?

If the shoe fits ...

[BigBear57]

If the shoe fits...........

What did the prince mumble repeatedly as he peered up Cinderella's skirt?

When in doubt...

[osuche]

What did the man say when he brought *both* hookers home?


Lick the plate

[dicksbro]

What did the dom tell her slave to do.

You can trust you car to the man who wears the star.

[osuche]

What did the General tell the woman who was stranded on the highway?

Finger Lickin Good

[dicksbro]

What did the colonel say to the young lady after they had sex.

The Lone Ranger

[jseal]

Who is somebody who really enjoys sex for one.


Its a local call.

[musicman]

what did I tell the guy who tried to dial long distance for pizza?

jinx

[south]

what is one thing that is always better when "High"?

bronze in swimming.

[dicksbro]

What do they call a poolside threesome.

Keep your end up.

[musicman]

what did the horny guy say to the woman when he want doggie style sex?

that is a bargain

[dicksbro]

That is a bar gain

When asked about the enlarged bar ... what did the guy say? :trout:

Cheaper by the dozen.

[musicman]

what did the bartender say when you ordered a round of shots?

lap dancers

[jseal]

What are Sumo wrestlers never?


A little to the right please.

[musicman]

what did the guy say to the woman who put her hand on his left thigh?

unmentionables

[jseal]

What are large political campaign contributions?


Spineless

[osuche]

How does Margaret Thatcher like her men?

Rock hard.

[jseal]

What was Tess’s previous nic?


It’s sticky.

[musicman]

what was exclaimed when the jelly doughnut exploded?

krispy kreme

[jseal]

What do you get from a frozen cow?


Fold it twice.

[osuche]

What not to do when putting on a condom?

Phone sex.

[jseal]

What costs a lot out of country?



Cyber sex.

[osuche]

What leads to sticky keyboards?

Alpha and omega

[dicksbro]

What is a polite way of prefacing the words "... damn it?"

I like sex because ...

[musicman]

can you think of a better way to spend your time?

just think....

[dicksbro]

What was the suggestion given to the lonely erotic novel author when his SO left him?

Tickets please ...

[jseal]

What does a bouncer at a popular brothel say?


He went thataway…

[dicksbro]

What's a good way to demonstrate the the "equal and opposite reaction" concept during an especially strong climax?

Eat me.

[jseal]

What does an M&M candy NOT say to someone who angers it?


It’s on my shoe.

[wyndhy]

where is the head of your penis?

meat popsicle.

[jseal]

What is a frozen frankfurter?


rear view mirror

[Catch22]

ttt

[Glyndwr]

rear view mirror

Where is the last place you want to see your lover's husband?


A chocolate tally whacker

[Sugarsprinkles]

What would you whack a chocolate tally with?




Presidential Debates

[osuche]

What is an exercise in futility? (Bush will never learn how to speak the English language)


The Wedding Planner

[jseal]

What is a father with a shotgun?



Suggestion Box

[osuche]

What have I installed on my nightstand? :D

Lick the plate

[dicksbro]

What do you do for her that you shouldn't do at the dinner table?

It's hard to get up in the mornings.

[Sugarsprinkles]

What doesn't a horny woman want to hear her man say?




48 hrs.

[osuche]

What is the guinness world record for having sex?

Liposuction

[Sugarsprinkles]

What's another way to say "fat sucks?"





Election Day

[exhib_it_all]

What's a Japanese hooker's favorite holiday?




erection day

[Sugarsprinkles]

What's a day worth celebrating?




Couch potato

[dicksbro]

What did the French Fry look for when she felt horny?

Growing excitement.

[Glyndwr]

What is the best job on the 'Emotion Farm'?

Lust for life

[dicksbro]

What typically describes Pixie attitudes?

Roll over please.

[Glyndwr]

How does Lilith greet newbie subs at pixies?

I can't look

[dicksbro]

What's the big problem wearing blindfolds?

It's going to happen!

[jseal]

What is World Peace?


I believe I'm about to arrive!

[osuche]

What did Britney Spears say while walking down the aisle during her last wedding?

Hold on....it's gonna be rough!

[dicksbro]

What did the male coconut say to the female coconut on their wedding night?

Are you kidding me?

[osuche]

Do I look like I'm pregnant to you?

Green eggs and ham

[WildIrish]

What're they serving at the "Butter Battle Breakfast Buffet"?

A snowshovel

[osuche]

What would Mr. Osuche need if we did plan to have elephants at our wedding?


Kibbles n Bits

[WildIrish]

What am I gonna get me some of?

A Peter Pan costume

[Galatea]

A Peter Pan costume

What do you not wear to a truckers convention?


Barney, Elmo, and Winnie the Pooh

[jseal]

What are two commercial marketing tools and a children’s story character?


Garlic flavored onion rings.

[dicksbro]

What do you put on the plate to protect rare steaks from vampire diners?

My roof's got a hole in it ...

[wyndhy]

what is the opening line to the play Sued by Santa

humpty dumpty

[Galatea]

Who got "laid"?

A carpet shampooer

[OzKristin]

what cleaned my carpet today?

Body Gel

[blkcat]

why do i call my dog carpenter,


because he's always doing odd jobs around the house

[dicksbro]

Why does a bordello keep some strange ol' geezer on it's staff?

What's for breakfast?

[IowaMan]

What is biscuits and gravy?


A hot and yummy treat.

[dicksbro]

What is lovemaking?

What is best left uncovered?